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Monday, March 21, 2011

Needing a little R-N-R

Why must my body remind me that I am over tired and in need of sleep constantly?  Recently my weekdays and weekends have been filled with things to do.  Since the beginning of the year it has been constant "things to do" and "places to go" and "chores to complete".  Where does this leave me?....tired.  I am tired when I go to bed (well, duh...of course) and tired when I wake up and tired all day long.  It makes my focus feel like it needs more focus.  I think what I really need is time off just to have sleep late for more than 2 days......stay up late watching movies a few nights....and have time to spend on maybe a creative dinner with maybe a glass of wine while cooking instead of the "whine" I have now while cooking.  LOL.  To maybe be able to read a bit and just be a bit lazy.  April 1st the campground opens and I am certainly looking forward to it.....I hope I can rejuvenate this tired old body and renew my spirit in the calm of the Jersey shore.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011


I am working on healing...I truly am.  I still think about Mom every day.  I did really good today.  Was proud of myself...went into work was happy and had a good attitude all day.  Oh...don't get me wrong...I still have that empty-punched-in-the-gut sort of feeling but I was working past it.  Was really proud of myself.  Then........

The Doctor called me to tell me how sorry he was for the loss of my Mom.  I could not hold it together...then I cried...and even made the girl sitting next to me cry.  :-(  Couldn't help it he told me a lot of nice things about my Mom for which I felt very proud.  I feel good about the person my Mom was and I told him she was happy and joking all the way to the end....and he said he believed it based on how she was always happy when she came to see him.

This healing process is going to be long and hard......probably the hardest one I have ever experienced in my life.  But, like my Mom, I too am strong and I know I can do this.

<3 Forever my Mother <3